let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize