so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Randomize
