I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
