She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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