i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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