my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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