True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
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