Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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