If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Randomize
