Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
