I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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