Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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