i would punch a child for taco bell
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
Randomize
