I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Randomize
