Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize
