so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize
