oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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