The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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