"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
my vag is so smooth its legendary
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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