It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
how drunk are you?
Several
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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