Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
