Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
