Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
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