I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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