it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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