My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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