im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
