i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
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