He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Randomize
