Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
