like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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