The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize
