If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
