Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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