Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
