whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Randomize