I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
