Christians are straight up FREAKS
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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