Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Randomize
