You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
