How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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