Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Non-Jews are for practice
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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