Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
