God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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