I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
