you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
How does one acquire holy water?
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
how drunk are you?
Several
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
