happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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