I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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