Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
