So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
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